Marriage problem’s

HOW TO DEAL WITH TROUBLE WITHIN YOUR MARRIAGE

I have been married to love of my life for 13 years. We have had our ups and downs for sure. One thing that I have learned over the years is that making her happy is how I make myself happy. I have learned that it is not about me, it is about making sure she has what she needs and also making sure she feels loved not just once a week or even once a day, but every time I talk to her on the phone or see her. I do little stuff like answer the phone and say “hello love” or “hi best friend”. I don’t say these things just to say them but because I feel them. I want her to fell like she is respected and feel like she is taken care of by making sure she has the things she needs as well as some of what she wants so I work hard to make it possible for her. Acts 20:35 I have shown you in every way, by laboring like this, that you must support the weak. And remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ ”.

This verse is powerful and just proves my point that it is not about me.

We have been thru and are still dealing with not having children and it is one thing in our lives that makes both of us depressed and sad but because of our faith in God we both know that if it is in His will we will conceive. If not we will be able to help people going thru the same things we have and still are going thru. We have fought about other things but to be honest I don’t really remember what it was about. Just goes to show that it was not important enough to even of had an argument over it.

Not being able to have children (at this point) has put a strain on our marriage. I fell like it is my fault and get down in the dumps but seeing her upset about it CRUSHES ME. I don’t have any of the answers and none of you that think you have them don’t either. We have made peace with it and know that we can handle any thing that comes our way because we have made it thru this battle and because of the love, grace , and mercy our lord and savior Jesus Christ. We still get upset and have bad days over it but ultimately know that we are blessed no matter what because of what Jesus has done for us.

Ephesians 5:28-33

So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

We are to be one flesh. We are to respect each other and we are to love each other. We are to pour into our wives and wives are to pour into your husbands. We must be vigilant about what is going on in our marriage. We have to swallow our pride and be a man that our wives want to submit to.

Marriage is not easy! I try to be mindful of not just what I say but how and when I say it. If I was to get short with my wife in our home alone that is one thing but doing it in front of people is something that is not only hurts but it shows a lack of respect for her. If I want my wife to respect me I have to respect her. The biggest problem I see in marriages today is that there is no respect and that they are not thinking about each other, only about themselves

So how do you deal with trouble in your marriage?

1. Put God First! Your marriage will be blessed!

2. Pray together about what is going on in you marriage and talk about a way to resolve the issue.

3. Put away your pride and take responsibility for your actions. We ALL do and say things that we regret. Don’t be so full of yourself you can’t even say your sorry and mean it.

4. Remember that no one is perfect. Show some grace.

5. When you say you forgive your spouse mean it. You have to forget about it and move on.

6. Pour into each other. Be positive. Be motivating. Ease up on the nagging ( both sides )

7. Do little things to show your affection. It dose not have to cost anything. Leave a note or just say how much you love and appreciate them for what they do.

8. Don’t stop dating each other. A date does not always mean you have to spend a lot or even any money. Just make time to spend with each other.

9. Never speak ill of your spouse to anyone. If you have a problem speak to them about it not your co workers.

10. Be silly, have fun, and love each other. Try to make each other laugh.

I love you Amber more than I did yesterday and I will love you even more tomorrow. Thank you for bing the strong, kind , wonderful woman you are. Thank you for always believing in me and lifting me up when I don’t think I’m worth it. You are amazing and I thank God for you everyday.